Cheating 101: BOLO for These Cheater's Behaviors During Valentine's Day

We have been doing investigations for more than 35 years. We do everything from civil litigation investigations to insurance fraud to small business theft. But our number one stream of business still is domestic cases, including child custody and cheating spouse (or domestic partners). So we've learned a few things over the years that we know you should be on the look out for (BOLO), which should raise your suspicions. If you observe any of the following things this week, it may be time to give a private investigator a call.

1. Large cash withdrawals. This is the biggest tip off. Of course, your significant other may be withdrawing cash to hide a purchase made for you. However, the easiest way to keep purchases for others hidden is to pay with cash. If the affair is just beginning, then the purchase will be large because it will be made to impress.
2. Frequent cash withdrawals. If you notice an uptick in cash withdrawals around the same time of day, then this could be a tip-off to hotel rendezvous. Check the location of the ATM or banks; if they are out of the way or near a hotel district, then your radar should be going off. 
3. Change in gift type. If you receive something unusually unromantic or unusually small, then the motivation is likely being diverted elsewhere. Be wary of any big changes. Rarely, but it does happen, you may get the "guilt gift." So if you receive an over-the-top romantic gift, then this too should turn your radar on. Don't be too suspicious, but BOLO for other behaviors in this list. 
4. Sudden change in plans. If there is a sudden change in your Valentine's Day plans that exclude you, then it's time to BOLO. Cheaters will generally play the planning game until the last minute, then make the change one or two days out. The day before Valentine's Day, for example, they are asked to work late.
5. Nervousness and stress. Planning two gifts and dates, keeping things secret, and the anxiety that comes with feeling guilty is stressful. If your significant other seems grumpy or generally dealing with a lot of unusual stress--cheating could be a reason.

The above does not necessarily mean something is wrong. This is why you want to hire an investigator--too verify your suspicions. Trust, but verify! It could be likely that, for example, your life partner really does need to work late and is facing some stress due to a project. But if you do notice the above, then be on the lookout for infidelity.

Hopefully none of the above applies to you and you'll have a very Happy Valentine's Day! 

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